Just Add Hot Water
by KaraOhki
Summary: Normally, hot water produces good results in Ranma 1/2.  Not this time!


**Just Add Hot Water**

A Ranma 1/2 fanfic by June "KaraOhki" Geraci

April 15, 2001

Revised May 20, 2001

Ranma 1/2 is the creation and property of Rumiko Takahashi. I'm merely borrowing it for a bit. This story was written for entertainment purposes and may not be used commercially

Bayankala Region, China.

The earth shook.

Everyone for miles around took cover or fell to the ground, holding on and hoping the movement would stop. An ear-splitting shriek rang out, causing widespread panic. People fled in every direction or collapsed in tears, praying to their gods for deliverance. Why had this scourge come to China?

Then as suddenly as it had begun, it stopped. Mothers picked up their children and covered them with kisses, weeping in relief. People scanned the horizon, looking for the horrible vision that they had been expecting. What had happened?

A light rain pattered on the roof of a small house where a man held his crying daughter in his arms. The shrieks outside were getting louder, and they had nowhere to hide. Then there was no sound but the rain on the roof. They waited a full hour before venturing outside. While they did so a newly cursed creature crawled out of a spring and walked away, growling softly to itself. Soon the rain erased any tracks it left behind.

A group of warriors left their village and searched the area for signs of what they had heard but not seen. They were beginning to think that they had imagined everything when they found the giant tracks leading to the cursed springs. The tracks were full of water, softening the edges, but they had no doubt what had been there. They also had no doubts as to what had been the fate of their visitor. Jusenkyo had claimed another victim.

"Now is the time to find it," said one. "We must track it down and kill it."

"That would be an excellent idea if we knew what form it had taken," replied one of her friends, "but I see no tracks leading from the springs."

Despite this handicap, the women searched for several days before giving up and returning home. During this time they had slain many small animals, taking the precaution of pouring hot water on each one just before death took it. Unfortunately, none of them proved to be cursed.

Miles away, the wandering animal stumbled into a hot spring.

A Chinese soldier sat on a hilltop, watching the approaching monster through his binoculars. He picked up a radio and called his commanding officer.

"He is heading for the ocean, General. Perhaps he wants to go home."

"Let him! I don't know how he got here with no one seeing, but we're damn lucky he didn't kill anyone! Tell everyone to stay out of the way."

"Yes, sir!"

Godzilla approached the ocean. He had been looking for it for days, but this land had such huge trees that he couldn't see it. Then he walked through the hot spring into a place with much smaller trees, and the first thing he saw was the distant sea. He knew that his home was on the other side of that sea and he headed toward it, walking over and through anything in his way.

"I don't believe it!"

"What don't you believe, soldier? Report!"

"He's gone! He got to the beach, and he just disappeared!"

"You mean he went into the water?"

"No! He walked into the surf, and then he just vanished! I can't spot him anywhere!"

There was a long silence before the soldier got a reply.

"We'll send a plane out to search. As for you, report back here! You have some explaining to do."

Nerima Ward, Japan.

Kasumi sat in the living room, her mind half on the mending in her lap and half on the newscast. Then her head jerked up, she stared at the screen, and she jumped to her feet. Soun and Genma looked up from their game and went white.

"Ranma! Akane! Come quickly!"

Pounding footsteps came down the stairs and Ranma ran into the room half a second ahead of his fiancee. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Kasumi pointed at the television screen. "Look!"

On the screen, the announcer was pointing at a map of China. "The first sightings of Godzilla were in this area, where he mysteriously vanished. No further sightings occurred until this morning, when he was seen several kilometers from the sea. Chinese military followed Godzilla's movements until he reached the shore, where reports say that he mysteriously vanished."

"Godzilla?" Akane suddenly found herself hanging onto Ranma's hand. "He's back?"

Ranma shrugged. "What are you so excited about? He's in China! Let THEM worry about him!"

Soun began to wail. "Noooo! He mustn't come back here! He took my darling wife, and now he'll take my babies!"

"Now, now, Tendo," said Genma. "Listen to the boy. We probably won't see him at all."

Ranma just stared. No one had ever explained to him how Mrs. Tendo had died. It was Godzilla's fault? No wonder Mr. Tendo was such a wreck.

Kasumi switched off the television, where the story had shifted to baseball scores. "I hope the two of you are right. I remember…" she sniffled, and fought hard to maintain her composure. "I remember she pushed us out of the way, but she couldn't run fast enough." Kasumi burst into tears and ran upstairs, followed by her youngest sister.

The news was filled with the hunt for Godzilla for several days. Planes from China searched to no avail, and the Japanese government also took the precaution of searching, but there was no sign of the monster.

The members of the Tendo and Saotome families watched the news as an expert gave his opinion. "Godzilla has gone back to sleep," he said. "There have been no signs of his presence - none at all. Therefore we can conclusively state that there is no danger."

An exhausted little animal clung to the piece of driftwood he had chanced upon, watching the distant shoreline. It seemed to be getting closer, and he was so hungry and tired.

A young woman leaned back in the hot spring, eyes half closed. The smell of grilling food made her mouth water, and she looked up to see how her husband was progressing making their lunch.

"Is that nearly done?"

"A few more minutes. You don't want it raw, do you?"

"I suppose not." The girl paused before smiling seductively at her husband. "If you don't HAVE to watch it cook, why not come sit with me?"

The couple was so involved in each other that they didn't hear the approach of the animal; but they did hear when the grill was knocked over. Both looked up to see a small black pig eating their steak.

"Hey! Cut that out!" The young man kicked out and sent a spray of water in the direction of the marauder. "That's OUR lunch!"

The pig rippled, changed color, and grew. The last thing the two young people thought was that they would have been better off letting him eat their lunch.

The live report had everyone glued to the television. A reporter stood there in the rain, with an umbrella in one hand and a microphone in the other.

"…completely destroyed the spa behind me, and devoured a pair of newlyweds before vanishing into thin air. If not for the reports of eyewitnesses and the tracks left behind it would be difficult to believe that Godzilla is here. No trace can be found of him, and his tracks simply stop. Everyone is urged to remain calm and wait for more information."

Ranma's arm crept around Akane. His fiancee was trembling. Then a huge crash and a hole in the wall announced the arrival of another young woman.

"Ranma protect Shampoo from monster!"

Before Ranma could reply another girl took advantage of the hole in the wall, and he was confronted by Ukyo.

"Ran-chan! He's COMING!"

"Um!"

"Boy, it's a martial artist's obligation to protect those weaker than him! You do that!" Soun and Genma turned toward the hole in the wall but found it blocked by everyone in the room.

"Where are the two of you going?" demanded Nabiki.

"Nowhere?" said Soun.

"Right," replied Akane, stroking her mallet affectionately.

He was hungry, tired, and extremely irritable. There was something wrong with him, because he couldn't breathe fire, and everything was too big. Those irritating two-legged creatures were bigger here, and none of them were afraid of him. He needed food, and he needed rest.

Rest won. As he slept, he was lifted up by a pair of small hands and carried off.

"Wake up, Charlotte!"

Godzilla opened his eyes and growled. Azusa giggled, and patted his head, narrowly avoiding having her fingers removed.

"Good morning, Charlotte! Does little Charlotte want breakfast? Is little Charlotte hungry?"

The only reply Azusa got was a growl, but that just made her giggle again. "You're not a morning person, are you? Mommy will bring breakfast!"

Ten minutes later Godzilla the piglet was devouring a substantial breakfast. That made him feel somewhat better, until the irritating person who had just fed him picked him up and hugged him fiercely.

The phone rang at the Tendo Dojo, and Akane ran to answer it, to discover that her friend Yuka was calling.

"Akane, I thought you should know this. That ice skating girl Azusa has your pig again."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I saw her going into her house this morning, and she had him in her arms."

Akane went from calm to furious in a second. "How COULD she! I'm going to get him back right now!"

Azusa hummed happily as she ran the bath. Her cute widdle Charlotte was a teensy bit smelly and dirty, and needed a nice bubble bath.

She also hoped that a bath would make Charlotte happier, since she'd spent the last hour throwing herself against the bars of her cage and growling. She opened the cage and removed the struggling piglet, once again avoiding the snapping teeth.

"Be good, Charlotte! The nice bath will make you all better!"

Azusa tossed the piglet into the tub and fell over as something went through the roof of the house. Her eyes followed the large green foot in front of her up, up to the gleaming teeth.

"Charlotte! What did you do?"

The foot was raised and came down towards her, making a huge footprint in what had once been Azusa's lovely bathing room. Then Godzilla moved on, leaving the girl under the rubble she had rolled beneath to avoid being crushed. As he did so the burst pipes soaked him, and a small pig ran out of the wreckage and out of sight.

When Akane arrived at Azusa's home, she found a rescue team extracting her from the wreckage.

"Charlotte! Charlotte!"

"Is there someone else inside?" asked one of the rescue workers. Akane held her breath waiting for the response.

"My Charlotte was here, but she got big and walked away!"

"Don't bother listening to her, she's obviously hysterical," said one of the paramedics as they carried Azusa off. "Anyone who has Godzilla step on her house has a right to be."

Akane turned around and ran towards home.

"Well, look who's here!"

Godzilla-pig looked up and saw an unfamiliar face. Then again, all humans were unfamiliar to him, except the one who had put him in a cage. If he ever saw her again he would eat her. He tried to duck out of the way but a ribbon wrapped itself around him and he fell over, hopelessly tangled.

"If it isn't Akane Tendo's pet! How lovely to see you again." Kodachi began walking; the pig firmly tucked under one arm.

"Perhaps I can convince Akane Tendo to trade you for her fiance. After all, she loves you more than she does him."

"Ranma! Find my baby! She's out there all alone, and Godzilla is here! FIND MY BABY!"

"I will as soon as you let go!" replied Ranma irritably as he tried to get loose from the stranglehold Mr. Tendo had on him. Soun released him and Ranma took off. He had no idea where Akane was, but he was determined to find her.

"What are you doing with that filthy creature?"

Kodachi frowned at her brother, who was sitting at the table enjoying a late breakfast. "Holding him hostage. I intend to trade him for my darling Ranma!"

"I wish you success, Sister! With the fiend Saotome out of my way, surely the fair Akane will be mine!" As he spoke, Kuno gestured with his teacup, sending the contents onto his sister and the pig. Kuno pulled his sister out of the way in time to keep her from being crushed.

Something was moving. Something that looked edible. Godzilla looked down and grabbed the thing that was sunning itself on the lawn. Midorikame became his second breakfast of the day. It tasted wonderful, but the hole in Godzilla's stomach was still there. He needed something more to eat. He looked over the wall of the Kuno home and spotted many two-legged creatures running away.

Behind Godzilla, Kuno waved his sword. "Begone, foul creature! How dare you trample on the Kuno home!" Godzilla didn't hear him. He was too busy focusing on the potential meals on the other side of the wall, and stepped toward them, into Midorikame's pond.

Godzilla vanished, and Kuno sheathed his sword. "Surely Godzilla is even more cowardly than Saotome! He dared not gaze on the face of Tatewaki Kuno, but instead fled in terror!"

The sound of screaming was enough to make Ranma run toward it. People running in the opposite direction impeded his progress, but he continued on. Beyond them there was nothing - just deserted streets. Then he caught movement out of the corner of his eye.

"Hey, Ryoga! What are YOU doin' here?"

Ranma picked up the pig and started back the way he had come. "I gotta get you back to the house so you can change back and help me find Akane. Just don't go getting' lost on me! Godzilla's around!"

The pig in his arms growled and bit him.

"Ow!" Ranma swatted the pig and held him up to his face, avoiding the teeth. "Willya cut that out! Akane's missing!"

Akane trudged into the house. She hadn't found her pet, and the entire city was in a panic. Perhaps Ranma would help her look for him. She felt safer when he was around, even if she'd never admit it to him. She turned around to shut the door and heard a familiar voice.

"Hey, Akane! What's going on? Everybody is going crazy!"

"Ryoga! Haven't you heard? Godzilla's here!"

"Godzilla? I'll protect you!" Ryoga rushed into the house and closed the door. "Where's Ranma? Did that coward run away?"

Then both paused as they heard a familiar voice.

"Hold still, willya Ryoga! I'm just trying to help!"

Akane rushed to the back door, followed by Ryoga. She found Ranma just outside, holding a kettle of hot water in one hand and P-chan in the other.

"Who are you calling Ryoga? I'm right here!"

Ranma whirled at the sound of Ryoga's voice. Akane stood behind him, Ryoga beside her. Ranma blinked before his nerveless fingers dropped the pig onto the porch. The kettle soon followed, and the yard became extremely full.

Food. There was food down there, and it smelled delicious. Godzilla leaned down and looked his victims in the eyes.

Then he howled in pain, as two of the puny creatures in front of him raised their hands and blinding lights flew toward his eyes, followed by searing pain. His attackers covered their ears at the sound at the same time as he stepped backwards, clawing at his eyes.

Ranma held his ears, trying not to pass out from the pain. Akane was already on the ground, holding her ears and sobbing. His and Ryoga's attack had given them a few seconds' time, and he needed to get his fiancee away before she met the same fate her mother had. By his side Ryoga was getting to his feet, and they moved as one toward Akane. Ranma lifted her into his arms and she clutched him frantically and buried her face in his chest. Ranma started to run into the house, intending to exit through the front, but stumbled on the porch when the earth shook as Godzilla took a step toward him. Akane went limp in his arms, and he set her down just inside the house and turned around to face his opponent. Ryoga stood at his side.

Then another roar filled the air, but it didn't come from Godzilla, but from the sky above him. A second later, it began to rain. Ranma and Ryoga stared in mingled shock and relief as Godzilla shrank and changed. The pig growled, ran into the house and leaped at Ranma, who caught him easily. He held the struggling animal and looked at his friend. Their eyes met, and no words were needed.

That evening three shaken young people stood behind the house, staring at a small mound of earth on the far side of the pond. Akane pulled out a pad and scribbled a note. Ranma and Ryoga stood close together and read it in the fading light.

"Should we tell anyone?"

Ranma shook his head negatively, and wrote for a few moments. "We better not. Nobody would believe us."

Ryoga grabbed the pad and made a note of his own. "We can't hear their questions anyway. You sure this is temporary?"

"The doctor said so," was Akane's written reply. "He said we were lucky."

They all looked again at Godzilla's grave. They had been very lucky.

Blame this one on my brother. He thought of the idea, but wouldn't write the story no matter how hard I begged him to, so I did it.


End file.
